Dear Virgin

This is my letter of complaint to Virgin Media, a company that prides itself of squeezing every last ounce of profit out of its products before even entertaining the slightest thought about customer service. Have a read you might enjoy it and then hopefully think twice before signing up for any of their products.

Dear whoever,

I recently (Wednesday 4:30 ish Uk time) had the misfortune to call the Virgin Media helpline with a query about my bill. I was put through to a lady who was obviously trying to break the speed talking world record, in that she spoke at about a hundred words a second and enjoyed the sound of her own voice so much that she didn’t feel the need to listen to what anyone was saying. I do hope that the call was recorded so that she can send it off to the Guinness Book of Records and bathe in the hard earned glory that she surely deserves.

This lady told me her name was Ash Sernandes which I know sounds like something you might find in the grate of your fire but I did find it hard to keep up with this world class orator (for which I suspect English was not her first language) so I may have written it down incorrectly. Whilst some of your customers might find Ash’s aggressive tone & inflexible attitude refreshing or even arousing I found it most obstructive to problem solving. I must apologise because I didn’t realise that I’d be part of some robot voice recognition training scheme, if I’d have been forewarned they I would have just stuck my head in a bucket of water whilst listening to the shipping forecast and spared both of us the hassle.

When I call your customer service hotline that’s what I expect to receive, some service, not have to wrestle with some deranged Harridan just to get a word in edgeways. This woman was rude and unreceptive, now I deal with the public quite a lot in my job and when I’m talking to my staff I do not stress the importance of being able to speak loudly and at great speed without listening, now this may shock you, I urge them to do the exact opposite after all if someone is using my service they deserve to feel important and that their concerns are listened to and should not be made to feel that they are a major irritant. I repeatedly had to ask Ash to let me finish making my point, once should have been enough for her to realise that I felt what I had to say was important.

So firstly my complaint is about the way I was treated when I called your Customer Service Dept and secondly it is to complain about a service I was sold.

I called Virgin recently to see about getting wireless router and was told that it would work out cheaper if I just upgraded my internet service as the router was included, so I did only to find out that there was a hidden delivery charge of £30 thus making this option more expensive (in the long run) than just buying a router outright.

I was quite incensed by this. I do not like to be lied to or have the facts hidden from me and that is exactly what the person I spoke to did. So I called your Customer Service Dept at the Martian Embassy and spoke to a robot about cancelling it, they told me that they could but there would still be a months worth of charges at the new rate. This wasn’t good enough for me as I don’t see why I should pay for something that was not as it was described to me by the salesperson. Sadly I had to demand to speak to the manager and to be fair when I did speak to him he was very good, very apologetic and resolved the issue for me, or so I thought. However I found this month that there was still a charge for the service that I had cancelled so I call you Customer Service Dept (Mars Division) and spoke to the amphetamine-fuelled, cyborg, known as Ash. This quickly became a battle of wills, as outlined above, and you only have to listen back to the phone call to hear for yourselves.

Anyway, I’m fed up with your appalling service. I’m fed up with speaking to people who have even less of a grasp of reality than they do of the English language. I’m off. I’m looking at Talk Talk and BT and whilst their broadband might not delivered via fibre optic cables and least their operatives are human.

p.s. I’ve posted this on my blog and it’s already had over a thousand hits.



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